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| Waking up at 10:30 in the morning, assuming it's Monday, very important day at work tomorrow, not fun. I FLEW out of bed. Yelled something. And then Casey just rolls over and says in a calming voice 'Sunday.' I guess it's somewhat good I have a roommate; lest I cry from misplaced days.
How much should I care? This is something I have been thinking about lately. That sentence is so unnecessary though, of course it's something I've been thinking about lately or you wouldn't be reading about it. So, anyway I try to let things roll off my back as much as I canre. The way I see it, getting upset or angry isn't gonna make anything better, at all. It's not that I try to suppress these feelings. Just whenever I feel an undesirable emotion I try to think about what caused it. And usually I feel silly about it after thinking. Of course it's not easy to always do this. And even when I do, thinking about what (or rather who) caused it can just lead me to blame someone and get even more pissed, at them. So when I believe a person is responsible I need to think about why they acted the way they did. Most people don't go around trying to hurt others, though it can feel that way at first. When I imagine a wise old man, he is always smiling. That's what makes him wise, he knows how to do this. But what is more important: letting things roll of your back, or sticking up for yourself. For instance, if someone spit in my face. I'd like that not to bother me, honestly. I'd like to be able to just wipe it off and go on with my blissful day. Of course, that's not what would happen. How is that old man so darn happy?
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| I had an energy drink affect me for the first time yesterday. Usually they just save me from exhaustion, but this one got me hyped up. I felt like I was gonna have a heart attack. And then I had nightmares for an hour and kept waking up covered in sweat, it was terrible. But at least it allowed me to see Hancock, which I loved. Still very much enjoying this summer. Have started working, which is great for reading.. unless I spend free time online... like now. I want to right a new about me for facebook but it's hard to go about it. When I was mopping for a couple hours I came up with the perfect thing but I can't remember any of it now. How do you define yourself? How do you define other people? I think other people are best defined by how they feel they should be towards other people; and how well they carry out that plan. But to define yourself is something wholly different. Which couldn't really be true. And it's entirely selfish, er, self viewing... can't think of the word, to view other people in relation to other people. So I suppose it should be a mix of ow they define themselves and what ever else I said. Though an even better way to define people may be what's important to them. Everything else kind of stems from there. Rambling....
There are 15 half-pages missing from my supposedly new book -_-
Edit: I'd really like people to comment more... at least let me know someones reading
:} I'd love to meet someone with a smile like that
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| I want so much to have a driveway. I just want my own place. I've never even had my own ROOM. And I probably never will. That's not too sad. I like being around people. A friend recently remarked to me that they get bored of people. I'm not sure that I do. Spending too much time with certain people can get me annoyed at them but I rarely want to be alone. I mean, when I am alone I enjoy myself. But I'd rather there was someone in the room, even if we're not doing anything together, it's just comforting to me. Like my blue shirt. Like I know a laserpod would be to me. And since I can't get the shirt I wanted I think i may actually buy one, today. I feel like I want to be done with school, teaching, maybe in flight school... hopefully. But it's always like that. We, well, I, always want to grow up. always want to get to that point of stability. But it's unreachable. I don't really mind. I like it where I am. I think. I just can't shake that'd I'd like it more; that I will like it more, in other places. I'm at work, lol. | | |
| When you die you'll be most remember as that old person. So don't get cranky when you're old. I like the Earth a lot. I don't know if you've noticed but it's pretty nice. Which is why I like those Ben Fold's lyrics:
sometimes I get the feeling
that I won't be on this planet
for very long
I really like it here
I'm quite attached to it
I hope I'm wrong
I want to see and experience more of the Earth and it's peoples. That's why I want to live in a lot of different place before I settle some place I like. I also want to do a lot of things. It sucks that things cost money. I wish I could sign up somewhere where I could work 16 hours a day for a year and then have enough money to live off of for the rest of my life. I wouldn't mind that. But I'm not partial to the current system. I also don't have enough free time. Either that or I'm spending it poorly and not noticing. I still can't play my accordion well and I still have books (though I've been reading a lot) on my shelves that need reading. And now I'm starting to miss the books I've already read. Anyone who says we have TOO much time on this rock is crazy. Not all of these things I want to do cost money. I want to roll around in the mud in the rain and other stuff like that that many people would consider dumb if not a little off. I have a lot to learn. The world is over whelming. I've said a lot of this before. Excuse my stream of conscious, you don't have to read this anyway. One of the first things I save up money for will be a plane. You can get one for a couple thousand actually, especially if you build your own, which seems fun in itself. I'd then have to pay 100s of dollars a month to store this plane. I've never even flown a plane; at least that should change soon. A lot of things on think geek are kewl. I think there is nifty/useful stuff there for everyone. CLICKY I myself am very interested in the Laserpod... among other things. That thing seems amazingly beautiful/relaxing. I'm easily amused, but I'm extremely grateful for that. I value my time a lot.. too much even... I think Malcolm X had a profound effect on me, in multiple ways.
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| So Bonnaroo was amazing. The drive down was beautiful. We stopped in D.C. and checked out the monuments, it was a beautiful day. We rolled into Walmart at like 2 am and immediately I crashed. Thursday we started with MGMT and it was perfect to start with after a long day of setting up the campsite. Then was Zach Galifianakis, Reggie Watts, and some other guys, all of which were hilarious. And right before the comedy show we met these three kids name Pason, Pierce, and Parker who were from Oklahoma, they also seemed really young. After funny we saw Vampire Weekend which was really fun. Friday was a crash day and I slept way too much of it. But I did get to see a couple good shows; though I missed more than a couple. Saturday was amazing, as were all the shows, especially Against Me! (who shocked me) and Pearl Jam (which was everything I wanted it to be), and of course Sigur Ros which was an experience. We then proceeded to meet this kid from Staten Island who actually works as a janitor in one of the schools AND knows our friend's brother. Not to mention he was awesome (and sketch  ) Sunday was a perfect way to close out the festival. It was sunny, we saw some great shows, napped, and Widespread Panic was ridiculous. They are extremely good, and the lights and atmosphere were great. On the way back home we had Sonic and Dairy Queen. That is important. First of all, Sonic slushies are ridiculous and I implore you to have one if you are unfamiliar. Secondly, we met some kids at the Dairy Queen (one of which is from England) and I was talking to them for a while. Makes me feel bad about Stony Brook because the school they go to has the same number of kids and it's this huge college town. Anyway, the rest of the drive home was fairly uneventful and philly cheesesteaks were underwhelming. Bonnaroo was an amazing experience that you can't really get anywhere else. Everybody is just relaxed and happy all the time. If someone get angry or sad it's shocking. Everybody is ridiculously nice to each other. Eddie Vedder was saying how 65,000 people can change things. And he's right. It should be like that all the time everywhere. The most you can do is your part, at least it's something.
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