Can I just say... teachers are cruel.

My teacher attempted to make me feel better but instead the last thing he wrote on my paper was: "37 days to go!" Thanks. I need not to be reminded of that!

To be honest with you, at this point in my life, I'm totally missing the younger years (If I can even call them that). Life in Japan was so much easier... no drama... sleepovers every night... never came home because I was always out playing... friends with everyone... god it was so easy & care-free back then. I would seriously give anything to go back in time and relive all those good and bad moments again.

Well right now I'm having trouble with some homework... the professor told us to choose a scene from a movie where we thought the acting/filming/editing/cinematography or something about it was amazing. THIS ASSIGNMENT IS SO HARD IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY. For a movie fanatic like me, there is more than enough scenes I love to death. How the hell can I choose one? Haha.

Ugh. I'm totally missing old friends right now. Friends from Japan... friends I'll probably never see again... friends I'll never talk to again... old friends... new friends... all the great people I got to meet. Man. But I'll discontinue from rambling about this stuff anymore. It is slightly depressing... okay VERY depressing actually.

And who feels like ditching the assembly tomorrow? Don't lie... you know you want to.

Last night was the greatest. Practically had a 4 hour conversation or so with my friend James who lives in England. We couldn't stop talking. We think alike and have so many similar interests it's not even funny. I was say what he's thinking and he always says what I'm thinking.... it's quite scary actually. He also told me about his birth parents.. since he is adopted... which was pretty amazing... well to me it was... because it shows that he really trusts me. I really appreciated him telling me that.

Some parts of our conversation:

James says:lol even if he was your worst enemy i imagine its still best not to hold anything against him, being a ufc fighter and all

James says:i pick my enemies wisely, mother teresa etc
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James says: you get to live in hawaii AND have your own timezone? soon you'll have your own theme tune

James says:so whats hawaii time? lol thats a groovy thing to say, ITS HAWAII TIME!!! sorry. 1 hour ahead of eastern time i assume?
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James says:am i totally wrong about where hawaii is or something?

James says:holy shit i am

Cynthia says:lol well eastern standard time is where New York is.. hmm are you lol?

Cynthia says:where did you think hawaii was lol?

James says:i thought hawaii was near those islands by florida.....

James says:im so ashamed to admit that now.

James says:you're in the MIDDLE OF THE SEA!!!!! you know if theres a tidal wave you're screwed

Doubt anyone will find it funny, but I dub last night the best night yet of this year. =] To be able to talk about ANYTHING to someone... it's the greatest thing. Everyone should experience that at least once.

Crossroads

I'm at a crossroads right now in my life. One turn leads to college, film school, the life that is predestined or chosen for me by teachers, professors, graduates, etc. The other turn leads to risks, no guarantees, passion, blood, sweat, tears, etc.

Seriously, I thought my heart and mind was set on film school. I was psyched. But honestly... now... after watching the Hitchcock film "Vertigo", I'm beginning to second guess myself. Is film school really worth it?

I've totally realized that practically 90% or more of film school graduates never make it. Never direct or create some sort of artistic piece. All of the big time directors you see now, the never went to film school, and if they did, they dropped out and used their tuition money to create a film.

I believe in the philosophy: study life, not film. Talent and passion is what counts... isn't it?

Fuck (Excuse the swearing), I don't know anymore. I honestly don't know what the hell I'm going to do about college. But I do realize that this is the most important decision in my life. I don't think my mom realizes that. Neither does my dad. This is my first major decision as an adult, not a child. This decision will affect me. I just don't know what to do though. And time is seriously running out. Fucking shit man.

Film is my passion. There is nothing else in this life that I want to do. This is it. I live for it. So I want to end this by thanking Alfred Hitchcock, one of my grandest idols, for opening my eyes. Now if I can only figure out what I'm trying to see.....

Hellooooo again.

LMFAO, did anyone watch Grease on VH1 last night? Such a great movie... I love it. Come on, you gotta agree with me here, the songs are hella catchy. Anyways... the break is going by SO fast. Summer school starts Tuesday already! Not really looking forward to that... but it's only a month.

I saw Surf's Up. Hah, it was so random... first half of it was hella funny.... second half didn't carry itself that well, but to be honest with you... I think it's up to par with Happy Feet. And the way it was filmed... like a documentary, I liked that. Different style. But after this... Hollywood needs to stop with all the damn penguin movies! Seriously. I don't think they are cute at all.

Well that's all I've got to say for now. Super short entry. Laters.