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| This is what happens when you fly in to a bad neighborhood...
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| The economy... part 2If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left.
With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00.
With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. - It's called the 401-Keg
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| The Stock MarketStolen, shamelessly, from a friend...
Once upon a time a man appeared in a village and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.
The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them.
The man bought thousands at $10 and, as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He next announced that he would now buy monkeys at $20 each. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms. The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so scarce it was an effort to even find a monkey, let alone catch it!
The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50 each! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would buy on his behalf.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers: "Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has already collected. I will sell them to you at $35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each."
The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys.
They never saw the man or his assistant again, only lots and lots of monkeys!
Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works. | | |
| Yes - I'm a hard core republican.
Yes - I found these vastly amusing.
All copyrights remain the property of their respective owners.
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| I offended a little girl today at the Zoo.
Yes, we're on vacation. More on that later.
So - there's a gorgeous scarlet macaw that I'm taking pics of - the bird says "hello"
She says "must be a pretty stupid bird, if all it can say is hello"
I turn and say "Well, it knows how to speak human, how much bird do you know?"
She says "None"
I say, "So, who's smarter? the bird that speaks human? or the human that doesn't speak bird"
her look was, well priceless.
Her dad just laughed. | | |
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