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jangymillan
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Name: jardine carla Birthday: 7/31/1988 Gender: Female
Interests: parties and clubbing,,
(i just love the energy,,!!)
love cofee as much as i love myself,,
love to shop til i drop,,
love watching movies,,
love dressing up,,
love pink,,
love playing basketball and billards,,
love music sooo damn much,,!!
(cant live,, cant sleep without it,,)
love black tops and
pareng marl,,!! haha,, Expertise: clubbing and partying,,!! nyahahaha,, Occupation: Student Industry: Business
Message: message meEmail: email me Website: visit my website
Member Since:
3/14/2005
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| when i was young, i used to live a life i like! i like my friends, i like my school, i like myself! but unluckily, i kinda had, what id like to call, "a series of unfortunate events"!
when i was in grade school, up till 2nd year high school, life was good! life didn't give much pain in the ass! people loved me for who i am, and i loved them in back! the only thing that's making life hard for me is my annoying, unruly, untamed, freaking wavy hair! now, my world seemed to have turned up side down! although my hair isn't that beautiful the way i want it to look, its a lot more ok now than it was before! the things that use to be fine back then, seems to be making a toll on me now! i loathe my school, i loathe the situation i am now with my peers in my school, i loathe myself!!
when i was 3rd yr high school, a lil controversy sprung in my previous school and i had to transfer! i think it was because my dad didn't want me to study in a so-called "christian" school lacking with values. i was convinced by his words, so i transfered!
i transfered to a school with a nice educational standard! but, on my first day there, i cried so much cuz i was so culture shocked! people there were so much different from the people in my old school! people kasi from my old school has breeding, most of them come from well-to-do families,, and they have class! in my new school, the stereotype was more of the unclassy type! so ang hirap mag adjust! my first year in that school was rough! a lot of them didnt like me because i was maarte daw,, i was even referred to as a bitch coz one time i wore mini skirt! so since i am a stupid person who wanted social acceptance i adapted stuffs from them, and slowly, i became like them! totoo pla ung saying nah, once you put a fresh tomato in a box full of rotten ones, it will spoil either! i talk like trash,, i act like trash!! so after two years of shit,, i graduated! and off i go to college!! college was more horrible for me!! same situation,, just worse group of people! they're dull- witted people! they dont know what the word "slacker" means! they are big fans of captain barbel, eat bulaga and all those SHIT!!
and i think i can say,, you cant blame me for being like this!! for feeling the way im feeling!! since i was young till i was in 2nd year,, i was brought up to act as an educated person and not like some out of school youth like these people im with now!!
im desperate for someone to pull me out of this quicksand!! i feel like im out of people to care! i feel like ive never made deep connections with my so-called friends because time did not permit us and we had to be separated for quite sometime! now i find myself , hating the world for being so mean! for making me feel isolated alone here in the dark! without anyone to cling on to! i just LOATHE life! i loathe myself! i blame myself for everything, but i know its not all my fault!! but i feel responsibe for everything thats been going on!! so blame me all you want now!! i would even let you kill me if you would!
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| 2 more years and im done! i want to get out of my freakin school! its dirty, its stupid and irrefutably hideous! the school is like an excuse for college students and professors, to say they're doing something with their lives! hallways are filthy, classrooms are awful, professors are WALANG KWENTA! its totally not conducive for learning, who would want to study there!? i honestly dont know what i did to deserve this! para akong pinaparusahan sa school ko! im with bunch of "simple minded" people, and in some strange ways, i feel like im bound with them! they dont know simple words such as slack, words usually teens use like orgy, hickies and stuffs! bobo diba!? i dont mean to be mean! but hey, these guys are the very people i hang out with every damn day! like one guy said, how can you fly like an eagle when your surrounded with turkeys! tama pla yung saying nah, once you put a fresh tomato in a box filled with rotten ones, it'll rot with them! and yah, i feel like a rotten tomato with these guys! they talk about captain barbel, girls who dances n eat bulaga! come on! im just being real! dont want to be mean! i know theyre my so called friends, but, i dont realy think theyre good for me!
i want to transfer. but if i do, id be a freshman again, and my two years in college, efforts, money, time, and a lot more, put to waste! ill be back to square one!
i heard a news that a friend just passed in the ateneo and i am dying with envy! oh well, my plans include studying again after graduation so, well see! cant wait to get out of my damn school!
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| i heard a news that someone is, soon, going to be living in the states. i had the most surreal reaction. i was not suppose to care! not suppose to bother at all. hes someone from the past. someone i have learned to get over with. but this loneliness has got to mean something. honestly, i was hoping we'd get to hang out again like we used to. be good friends again, and eventually, just like before, be something more than just friends. without our own hang ups this time. guess my fantasies are really meant to be just fantasies. they're not going to become reality. i think i'm like this just because we never had a formal closure. i deserve a closure! i deserve a freakin explanation! i deserve to know why i had to be treated like i was. oh well, now i know how important closures are! they aren't just to make a break up formal. it is something that explains why everything had to end! it makes your moving on a real moving on! well, theres youtube anyway. i can always see him, when i feel like missin him..
was suppose to meet up with my bestfriend today. but due to circumstances, we were not able to meet. why now? why now, when things aren't well? when things make me feel damn miserable! i feel like ive hit the bottom! im honestly at the lowest, most depressing point in my life!
I think I'll go to Boston. I think I'll start a new life. I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name. I'll get out of California, I'm tired of the weather. I think I'll go to Boston. I think that I'm just tired. I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind. I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of Sunset, I hear it's nice in the summer, some snow would be nice, oh yeah.
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| my first major ever! may marketing 1 nah ko!! ang saya!! my prof was like "as a marketing executive...",, "so if u are the marketing executive...",, "what marketing executives do is..."! and i could just feel my heart pounding with 'kilig' everytime she says "MARKETING EXECUTIVE". just so you know, that my friends, is my dream position when i work!! i could imagine myself wearing channel,, prada,, gucci,, and all that stuffs,,!! hai grabe,, kinikilig tlga ako!! 
just today,, i heard a rumor about mr. dream guy! nah isa pla xang malaking JERK! he broke up with his ex through text,, and he went something like,, "lets break up! i found someone new!" tae,,!! anong klase un,,?! i thought he was different,, but i was deceived!! wla na nga pla lalakeng matino ngaun!! lahat SELF-CENTERED JERKS,, CLUELESS and STUPID!! | | |
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