I love my major. Who else can get covered in paint splatters and muddy clay for a living? Mm... possibly a plumber.

Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of — throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace.
C.S. Lewis

 

Sometimes I dream too small. Sometimes I’m scared to dream big because I know God is really big enough to make it happen… and we wouldn’t actually want to end up being that “palace” someday, now would we? What would motivate a life to risk everything for the sake of the gospel? Reckless devotion to Christ holds both a particular fascination and a paralyzing fear in my heart. The kingdom of heaven is brought about here on earth at a high cost: the loss of a spouse, a child, friends, even life. Do I love Jesus enough to risk losing my security? Losing the respect of some people? What excuse is keeping me from sacrificing all for the sake of Jesus’ name?   

 

I pray that I will desire Christ enough to put my comfort on the line. Do I really believe that He is better than my vocation or future dreams? I feel that in Western evangelical circles, our faith has been so personalized and individualized that we forget that it should be a launching pad. That personal faith should be overflowing and pushing us to share the Good News with the nations. Have we missed the very point of our salvation? Father, keep me far from the heart that belittles the cross of Christ. Make me fearless. Set me free from the sin that so easily entangles me… the idolization of security and respect. Your fame and renown is at stake. You are the gospel.

 

When asked what his vision was for us students as we go out into the world, my dear president here on the mountain replied with tears in his eyes, “Truly? I want every one of you to go out and die. Don’t save yourself for some future. Give it your all now. Let it rip… every day. No holding back. Give it all for Christ.” 

 

John Paton had the heart that I yearn to have one day. A well-respected deacon in Paton’s church heard that he was going to do mission work in the New Hebrides and exploded, "The cannibals! You will be eaten by cannibals!" The memory of Williams and Harris’ martyrdom on Erromanga was only 19 years old. But to this Paton responded:

Mr. Dickson, you are advanced in years now, and your own prospect is soon to be laid in the grave, there to be eaten by worms; I confess to you, that if I can but live and die serving and honoring the Lord Jesus, it will make no difference to me whether I am eaten by Cannibals or by worms; and in the Great Day my Resurrection body will rise as fair as yours in the likeness of our risen Redeemer. (p. 56) John G. Paton: Missionary to the New Hebrides, An Autobiography Edited by His Brother

Simply put? Don’t settle for the decent little cottage when your Heavenly Father is planning a palace in which He can dwell and glory.  

These little guys from Brazil reminded me a lot of my kids this summer. The photographer is incredibly talented and has a variety of portraits that touched my heart. I stayed up way too late tonight flipping through album after album of street children. Check it out at http://flickr.com/photos/beija-flor/.

These past few months, the Lord has just been revealing how truly beautiful His gospel is. I live with a bunch of hurting kids who endure unimaginable hardship on a daily basis... many abused, many with parents who are alcohol or drug addicts, a couple who are involved in the "brotherhood" of a gang. They would wear the same thing for an entire week and not even bring sheets or a pillow with them. I began to wonder time and again if it was because their parents didn't care enough to make sure they packed it, or if they simply didn't have sheets or a pillow at all.

Yes, I broke up fights and treated bloody noses. I was woken up almost every night because of a kid who was afraid of the dark or who had wet their bed... again and again and again. But the beauty of the gospel was brought alive as I listened to my kids ask, their eyes wide in wonder, "Did God really do that? Did He really part the Red Sea? Did He really help David kill that Giant? Did He really die... like that?! And He's alive?!" So many questions. My kids were so illiterate that they couldn't even read the Bible verses laying in their lap. Truth so close... and yet, so out of reach. I walked the streets of downtown Baltimore one weekend, feeling far from safe and continually inching closer to the much stronger form of Jarod who had come with me. Street after street was lined with seemingly empty, condemned apartments, but I knew better. My kids would flippantly tell me where they lived throughout the week... some even with pride, like it was their gang turf. But I had seen those streets, and it made my heart break inside.

I could tell you a million and one stories...  feel free to ask me sometime because I love talking about my kids. We taught our inner-city kids this song written by Jon Foreman, lead singer of the well-known band Switchfoot. It was one of the few songs that I would hear the kids singing outside of chapel on their own free will. And believe me, it takes a whole lot of grace to get a 13-year-old guy off the streets of D.C. or Baltimore to sing a song from chapel. But it did my heart good to hear them sing... a reminder to pray that they would understand the truth they were uttering.

Your Love is Strong
Heavenly Father
You always amaze me
Let your kingdom come
In my world and in my life
You give me the food I need
To live through the day
And forgive me as I forgive
The people who wrong me
Lead me far from temptation
Deliver me from the evil one

I look out the window
The birds are composing
Not a note is out of tune
Or out of place
I walk through the meadow
And stare at the flowers
Better dressed than any girl
On her wedding day

So why do I worry?
Why do I freak out?
God knows what I need
You know what I need
Your love is strong

The kingdom of the heavens
Is now advancing
Invade my heart
Invade this broken town
The kingdom of the heavens
Is buried treasure
Will you sell yourself
To buy the one you've found?

Two things you told me
That you are strong
And you love me
Yes, you love me

Our God in heaven
Hallowed be
Thy name above all names
Your kingdom come
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven
Give us today our daily bread
Forgive us weary sinners
Lead us far from our vices
And deliver us from these prisons

It's summer and my fascination with certain video games has been revived.  I don't know if it's because I grew up with a lot of brothers or because I love the colorful graphics and adventurous storyline... but I'm hooked on our N64 version of Donkey Kong. Now, I'll admit that it may not be the most beneficial use of my time... but hey, it's summer :)