Wednesday, August 20, 2008
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On China
Obviously, the Olympics are going on, and they're being held in Bejing this year. There has been lots of talk of boycotting the Olympics from both neocons and neoliberals. I suppose I ought to define those terms for your pleasure:
Neocon - the new conservative class. They're rich, old, white, male, Christian, and straight (except for their celebrity fucklist (see Friends), which features Georgie Jr., Georgie Sr., Ronnie's corpse, Rush, Bill, and Sean.) I hate them because they increase spending exponentially by bombing people in other parts of the world (thus tripling our deficit every couple of years), and they use this as a justification to take away MY civil liberties.
Neoliberal - the sensitive type. They're young, racial minorities, grew up poor and abused, bisexual, transgendered, female, "enlightened," and generally"oppressed" (or want to pretend they are, anyway.) I hate them because they play the more-disadvantaged game, lie to themselves and others about the state of the world, hate/love things because it's popular to do so, support raising taxes to redistribute wealth in a socialistic-style quagmire, and want to take away MY civil liberties (environmentalism? spare me!) These types don't need a fucklist, because they would never be in something so restrictive as a monogamous relationship. But if they did have one, they'd be sure to make it look like a college admissions brochure with a calculated ratio of individuals from every possible background.
Anyway, neocons want to boycott the Olympics because China is anti-Christian. Chinese communists are atheists, they cry (erroneously). How dare that government repress my views! I mean, I'm okay with shutting up those annoying atheists* over in America, but that's different! The atheists want to destroy my family and eat my flesh raw! Often, they come up with other excuses, but at the end of the day, it comes down to the confrontation against their religion. No wonder neocons are all old - their brains have deteriorated to the point that they now no longer understand basic logic.
*According to the neocon, an "atheist" is any non-protestant, excluding Muslims, Catholics, and Jews, who are terrorists, the antichrist, and manipulative bastards, respsectively.
Neoliberals want to boycott the Olympics because of China's abominable history of human rights violations. I mean, it's like, so horrible, what they do and stuff. Hey, you! Turn off that TV! You're supporting tyranny! What? You want to know what they've done? Well, it's all over the news, geez, just go google it. [Note for those of you who may not get this element of satire: I'm not saying China hasn't violated human rights, just that in this, as in most things, people are too lazy to look up the "facts" they use to justify telling me what to do. If you want me to do something, at least tell me why.]
Both groups claim that watching the Olympics on tv will directly support the Chinese government. However, all revenue from the Olympics comes from tourism, not from tv advertisements (which profit only the tv station itself). Yeah, yeah, China could get the Olympics again if we watch the tv! But even then, it will still only be the people traveling there who will be lending any kind of support to their government. For that matter, those of us who live here need to take a good long look at our own government before we condemn foreign systems, particularly when we're supporting them every day in other ways, which brings me to my next point...
This weekend, I had the fortune (or misfortune, depending on how you view it) to attend a retreat for student leaders. At one point, they gave us these cute little engraved recycled-paper notebooks. We were all admiring them, when one girl at my table saw the inevitable sticker bearing those dreaded words: MADE IN CHINA. She was horribly affronted, and immediately went to go complain to the adult staff members in charge of the retreat. She did this less because of China's political policies and more because of the famed sweatshop labor that gets us cheap goods from the country, among others.
Now imagine that you are a woman in China. You work at a sweatshop - long hours of hard work for little pay. But it's enough to keep your family surviving. Your life is full of fatigue and often misery, but you do not starve, and you have time to live and play with your family. If Americans stop buying those factory products? Your friend is fired, for no good reason, just because they didn't want to pay her anymore. Not enough profit, they said. You watch her leave, sobbing. A month later, you hear that she starved to death. You work even harder, hoping for a raise, or anything - just keeping what you have will keep you and your family alive for at least another week. One day, they announce that Americans simply aren't buying their products any more. You can all go home. "Home?" you ask, "But what will we eat?" No one seems to hear you - their eyes are glazed over, their brains refusing to feel what they've just heard. There's nothing you can do.
The bottom line is that those factories are horrible places to work or (in some cases) live. You work long hours, often every day a week, often in unsafe or uncomfortable conditions. You earn just enough to scrape by, for all that work. But where would you be without it? When the factories close, the workers starve. Boycotting is NOT the way to solve that particular issue. I don't like the situation any more than you do, but try finding some real, productive ways to solve it, besides just shutting down their industry altogether.
And I swear, if I hear ONE MORE FUCKING WORD about race or racism, I'm going for scream loud enough for you ALL to hear me. I got hit by Xanga and whiny college students about it at the same time. Ugh. People keep talking about it and politicizing it so much that they're making it into an issue even when it isn't one. Or, rather, they're addressing hardcore, recognizable racism. They don't address the fact that 90% of the black students at the retreat had isolated themselves at a single, homogeneous table. They don't address the fact that a black student organization feels like it needs to exist on campus - and it's one of the three biggest groups! If anyone ever tried to start a white student organization, there might be all of five interested students, even though Agnes Scott is primarily white. As much as I hate the handicap of appearing white in this country (YES, it's much more of a handicap than being anything else, except maybe Asian), I think I would much prefer being white and not having any sense of racial pride than being any other race, and holding these insidiously racist beliefs. Of course, I think that even if I had been taught pride in being a racial minority, I would have shed it, as I have shed my mother's even more blatant white pride and racism, but again, it may be partially cultural, so there's no real way to know for sure. I just have a really good hunch.
In summation: buy stuff from China if you need it and shut up about melanin and marginal facial bone distinctions. kthxbye.
Thursday, August 07, 2008
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Solitude and homelessness
Things haven't been so great for me over the past week or so. I think that things have just started compounding, and successively destroying my emotional state. I so often neglect or overlook my vaguely distraught emotions as insignificant that I don't notice when things are starting to bother me until they're brought violently into the forefront, either through confrontation or by simply experiencing so much pain that I finally start to examine what's wrong. Usually, it's sufficient to reason out the causes, symptoms, and solutions to this pain. When there is no solution, simply understanding it is enough to make me feel much better.
It started with the chemistry class. I wasn't ever really happy with the class, because it simultaneously bored and frustrated me. I did marvelously on the first two tests, so I absolutely stopped everything - I didn't do any more homework, I was late to class for an entire week, and whatnot. Disappointingly (but not unforeseeably), my third test grade wasn't quite as high as the first two. I think I might get an A- or (*gasp*) a B+ in the class. If it's a B, that will be the first one I've gotten, and really, there wasn't any good reason for it. Even if it's an A-, that still brings down my GPA more than it ought. Regardless of the grade, the class itself wasn't very fun. It wasn't sufficiently intellectual to captivate my interest, and the lack of math or writing background from most of the other students frustrated me to no end, particularly when I had to work closely with them in lab. I'm not going to have another class until late this month, so I'm going to be really aimless academically for a while, which I hate. I love going to school, and transitioning between classes for more than a week or so was never appealing to me.
Monday (the last day of class), my boyfriend left for nearly a month for his army reserve training. At first, I didn't really notice, because I had lots of chem homework that had been dumped on me by lackadaisical partners at the last minute. Plus, we talked on the phone Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday - not for long, but it was something. I don't need him to be happy, but his presence helps me cope with stress, and I miss him terribly now, since we had been spending hours of each day together. I'm going through a transition period with school, and that's not the same time that I need to feel a transition away from my boyfriend. There wasn't anything he could do about the timing, but it just sucks to have to deal with that. On top of all of this, I haven't gotten to talk to him at all today - the one day that I needed him most.
And then today, since class ended Wednesday, I had to move out of the lovely house with air conditioning and a full kitchen, in which I had my own quite large room. This is the worst part. Moving always makes me feel anxious. Last time I had to move, I got shingles from the stress. It doesn't help that, this time, I don't even have a home base to go back to. Since I didn't pay for housing from the end of summer school until the start of fall semester (thinking that George would, in fact, be available, so I could stay with him), I can't officially move in to my dorm room for another ten days. Fortunately, my friend Gina and her roommate are letting me stay with them in Main (a non-Air Conditioned dorm). We're the only ones on the hall, which is kind of surreal, and their room is really nice (not to mention I can use any room I want!), but it's not my place. Similarly, I could go stay at my boyfriend's apartment - I have a key and a parking space - but without him, it's just a cramped, cheap, messy apartment that reminds me of how I can't have him right now. And, of course, I could always go home to the reminder that my dad gave my amazing basement apartment to my brother, leaving me to sleep on the floor in the hot, small upstairs room, with half the space filled by my belongings (all in boxes of course) and absolutely no privacy.
I've never been one of those girls who really felt dependent on her boyfriend, helpless in school, or spoiled enough to expect to have a nice room always waiting for her where ever she goes. But the combination of these loses has indeed taken a toll on me. Some people may be offended by my title - "homelessness." After all, I have three places to sleep, where I can set my things up in a corner and shift through them to find one single thing. I even have running water, electricity, food, and internet access at each of those three locations. But I think the word "homeless" definitely applies to me. I have three rooms. I do not have a home.
How do you deal with poor circumstances? Have you ever ignored them until you just started to feel awful about everything?
Monday, July 28, 2008
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Why I love my boyfriend
My boyfriend often does kind things for me. He treats me like a lady. He carries me to the bathroom in the middle of the night when I'm ill. He cuddles me as though nothing else will ever be as important as that moment. He brings me cold water or walks over a mile in the heat of an Atlanta summer to get me fresh fruit - without me even asking. He's one of the sweetest, most patient people I know, and a great listener. He'll spend nearly two hours on public transit most weekdays just to see me for dinner. He lent me $300 for a corset, and waited patiently without mention or complaint until I paid it back in installments. He laughs with me, and tells me I'm beautiful even with a tear-streaked face and puffy eyes. Once, he peeled almost an entire bag of grapes for me, and brought them to school the next day, just because I mentioned once that grapes would be one of my favorite fruits if they didn't have that skin. He respects my wishes to keep V-day and anniversaries just like any other day: I believe that instead, people should strive to honor their partner every day, and he joins me in doing so.
Last night, my George outdid himself. Usually, he cooks for me, but last night, he went all out and made three different kinds of snapper:
There were other things, too (notably, honeyed apples and fresh strawberries arranged into a smiley face!) but I was a bit too distracted eating and thanking him to get pictures.

I love you, George
Monday, July 14, 2008
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Aging
I'm getting old.
I officially turned nineteen a few hours ago. Soon, I will have payments and a career. Soon, I will begin to lose the youthful beauty of my body and face. Soon, I will start to feel tired, sickly, and mentally dull. I really don't want to get older.
Nineteen, for me, has always been the mark of age. Eighteen is the best year: the youngest adult year. One has all the freedoms and (optional) responsibilities of an adult, while still being in school, and undoubtedly young. Aging is, undoubtedly, a part of life, but nineteen is the turning point. From as early as I can remember up until my eighteenth birthday, I wanted to be older. I wanted to be afforded the rights of an adult. I wanted to be recognized as a sovereign individual, not "just a kid." Of course, not all of this happened immediately at eighteen (particularly from my parents), but it was always the upwards goal. After this, goals no longer go in age increments, but in life-phase increments instead. The next goal is graduation, then grad school, then starting a career, then advancing in that career, then marriage and children(?), then retirement, then death. There are no set ages for these, and as such, I find myself with the anxiety of youth, rushing everything. I want to graduate now. I want to know what my career path will be, now. I have a vague time line of my next three years, but after that? Things are just uncertain. There is no moment towards which I will be pushing. There is no advantage to being older than I am right now. I will simply experience the physical hardships of aging, more and more each year. Each year will be a physical progressive descent into infirmary. Obviously, my intellectual, social, and emotional achievements do not need to do the same (and I expect that they wouldn't), but from now on, I have stagnated at least one of my measures of a perfect life. Many will dismiss this as the whining ramblings of an overanxious teen. Of course, you'd be right. There is the easy answer: eat right, and exercise. You won't feel as tired and you'll be healthier longer. That's much easier said than done. I've mostly got the "eat right" thing done, but exercise? Simply the idea makes me cringe.
I am no longer the youngest adult I know, and this thought is chilling. What's even more concerning than the fact that I feel older, is the way I phrased this in my mind. Youngest. As I get older, one thing that I do fortunately gain is wisdom and perspective. Most notably, my views on competition have changed dramatically. When I was younger, I used to long for competition. I wanted to prove that I was better than everyone else, at everything. There was ONE best artistic approach, ONE best body, ONE best intellect. I appreciated the efforts and abilities of others, but my narcissistic tendencies would not allow me to see them on the same playing field. I even thought that this sort of competitive mind view was good, healthy, and actually necessary for achievement. Clearly, this is a limited (and in some details, entirely false) approach, but it's one I am still combating. It's hard to focus on individual achievements instead of being "better" than someone else, particularly when I know that I have the ability to perform better than those around me. It's hard to define the line between healthy and unhealthy competition. Generally, I now understand that competition is bad. Outperforming someone on a task does not make me better. It doesn't even mean that I really deserved to win. Most of the time, particularly in my own life, "winning" is based on inborn genetic attributes. I get the highest grade on a math test, even though I never cracked open book, homework, or notes, because I have a natural affinity towards and ability to do math. My peer may have gotten a B on the test, despite hours of practice and studying. This does not make me superior to her. In fact, she is ethically superior to me, because I often have little sense of work ethic*. I may be intellectually superior, but so what? I didn't earn that. This often creates a paradox for me. I'd rather befriend a slacking C-student with a brilliant wit than a diligent A/B student with little natural mental ability, even though the second person surely ought to have earned more respect. I've explored this some recently, but to expand on it would take far more space and time than I am willing or able to give at the moment (and, I'm sure, would create more text than my readers care to even skim, given how long this post is sure to be already).
Back to the topic at hand, competition between other people is not an accurate measure either of how good you are or how good your genes are (though it is a measure of the interaction between the two). It is generally not a healthy way to build a life or philosophy, and it will not earn you any friends. It will not make you happier, and it will not foster your personal growth. It is hard for me to let go of competition sometimes, but I do make an honest, genuine effort, and it's easier every day. I encourage all of my readers to do the same, if competition is something with which you struggle.
What are your thoughts on aging? What important aspect of a life perspective have you struggled with in youth, and been working to correct? How successful have you been?
*I really do work on things when necessary. I only say this because it is rarely necessary for me to do so.
On my recent 4-part political series, I must extend my most sincere apologies to my most patient readers. I'm in an extremely time-consuming class right now, and I shouldn't have even taken the time to write this entry, but it was bearing on my mind. Sorry, do forgive me.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
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On totalitarian/militaristic political systems
For the purpose of this entry, I will be refering to all militaristic totalitarian political systems in a chunk. Basically, the main one I have in mind is fascism, but in case my readers haven't noticed, I believe in a vast political spectrum and "chunking" in this manner is the only way to accurately describe all political-economic systems. Furthermore, to me, politics and economics are so entertwined that I use them virtually interchangably. I understand the nuances, and I just don't want to get bogged down in those tiny details (and particulars about precise phrasing) in this blog. Also, this is the second in a four(?) part series on politics that I'm planning, so hold on. I'm going somewhere, I promise.
Militaristic political systems are based on a few essential founding premises:
1. National govenment should exist
2. Encouragement of blind patriotism
3. Religion as a tool of and partner with the state
4. Basic in-group psychology
Obviously, all of these things are related, and all are fundamentally designed to increase the power of the state. Hence, we have "totalitarian/militaristic" in the title. There are theoretical totalitarian political systems that are peaceful, but generally they would never last too long, because they have to convince the public that there's a need for all this money that's being stolen in taxes. A notable exception could be some variety of a collectivist political system, discussed below. This sort of system would still grant dictatorial powers the latitude to take as much money as they desire "for the public good," but it is somewhat less realistic than the militaristic variety of despotism, because it gives people entirely too much credit.
Collectivistic political systems as defined below require that the general public either voluntarily gives up or accepts the theft of the products of their labor. They require compassion (at least in the easy sense), trust, and some manner of cohesiveness without a binding factor like in-group psychology. Militaristic political systems, however, feed people's instinctive need for releasing aggression, tribal warfare, emotional comfort, intellectual complacancy, and most of the needs fulfilled by watching sports. It is much easier to gain control of an unwitting populace by convincing them that they need to "defend" themselves, or by convincing them of theology and nationalism, than it ever would be to convince them that they need to give up their income to feed an unknown starving family five thousand miles away. Personal need will always be a greater motivator, in the large-scale political sense, and this is why we have not historically seen peaceful large-scale collectivist societies; in order to maintain existence, they must morph from collectivism to militarism.
So, let me explain a little bit about "in-group/out-group" psychology.
Basically, in the field of psychology, there are all sorts of different perspectives - lenses, if you will - by which to examine a particular phenomenon. For instance, dreams can be looked at from a neuroscience perspective (the physical causes and reactions in the brain that trigger dreams), from a Freudian perspective, from a developmental perspective, from a social perspective.... I think you get the idea. The present topic is largely relevant to two fields or perspectives of psychology: evolutionary and social. Evolutionary psychologists seek to find historical sources for our instinctive genetic psychological tendencies. In particular, they examine how a trait would have been advantageous and facilitated survival, reproduction, and childrearing, thus enabling the gene(s) coding for the trait to be passed on and become more prominent in the species as a whole. Social psychologists seek to explain our needs and behavior in the context (or absence) of other human beings. They study things like the influences of other people on individual decisions, thoughts, and feelings, particularly in a certain context. For instance, Stanley Milgram's famous experiment demonstrated that, when asked to administer electric shock to people in the next room, nearly everyone went all the way to the highest level of shock, which was marked as lethal. Why did they do this? Perhaps they "trusted" the experimenters. Perhaps "someone else will just do it anyway." Perhaps they felt cowed by apparent authority. (Interestingly, more people went higher on the scale when an "authority" figure in a white coat told them to, as compared to people who were directed by a scientist in plainclothes.) Perhaps they had extreme bloodlust. (I'm kidding there- the experimenters noted that almost all the subjects were under deep distress). At any rate, it's obvious that people, in general, can be convinced to do horrible things when the conditions are right.
In-group/out-group psychology theorizes (again from the evolutionary perspective) that in early human development, tribes of people which were protective of close relatives (tribe members) and critical of or violent towards distantly related groups (other tribes), would be more likely to survive as a whole. The altruistic soldier willing to give his life for the clan may be bad for his own genetic survival, but he is good for the survival of similar genes in his whole tribe's population. This has been adapted to social psychology, in the sense that people (especially those who are uneducated/untraveled) are likely to shun people who are seen as "different" in appearance, culture, language, or religion, and accept and welcome people who are seen as similar. Furthermore, most people are capable of dehumanizing such different, "out-group" individuals, to the extent that they can morally justify murder. Just look at many modern evangelicals, who strive to dehumanize atheists and homosexuals, among others. They are definitely not the only culprits, as there are racists, linguistic superiorists, and other ethnocentrists evident in our society even today. Clearly, many of these groups have heavy overlapping; that's because the people who are most susceptible to one (culturally or genetically) are also equally susceptible to another, and many people require more than one in order to be completely convinced.
[For more information on the foundations of the formation of this theory in social psychology (independent of evolutionary theorizing), see this for a basic introduction to "social identity theory".]
"In-group/Out-group" psychology explains patriotism/xenophobia (which usually go hand-in-hand), religious intolerence, and racism, which are some of the prime components of a totalitarian/militaristic system. If the public can be convinced that their godly country is the best, and that others outside of that country are godless, savage heathens, then that public can start to dehumanize the "out-group," which makes it "ethical" (and sometimes "necessary") to harm or kill them. People start to see warfare as a game to be "won," like a sport. They become justified in their aggression by the (inappropriately applied) "need" to protect their own family, or even divine mandate. Religion is a useful tool in controlling the minds of individuals, convincing them that even their thoughts are monitered and will be punished. And, of course, the winners in all of this are the dictators who, in holding their political, economical, and social tyranny over their public, gain virtually limitless power, worship, and money.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
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On collectivist political systems*
There are two possibilities for a communal society - one by volition and one by force. I think we can agree that, at least on a large scale, a voluntarily collectivist society cannot function. Obviously, such units can exist in terms of families, but whether everyone born in a certain area would automatically choose to forfeit the product of his labor so people he has never met might eat? That's a rather outlandish idea that has no practical significance, unless you hypothesize that the freerider problem would be insubstantial (if you've seen the amount of people on welfare and other forms of government assistance already, not to mention the people convicted of theft or other crimes, I'm fairly confident you won't pick this option). Even assuming that enough people contributed enough of the products of their labor voluntarily, you still have the problem of a governing body, which I will address shortly...
Then, we have the more popular form of theoretical collectivist society - the one run and enforced by some form of government. So, if I refuse to surrender the products of my labor, they are seized or I am jailed/punished or I am exiled. This in itself is unethical, as it implies the use of force against an innocent civilian. However, a utilitarian might argue that a little enforcement of a Utopian collectivist society might provide the greatest happiness for the greatest number. So what are the effects of a collectivist mentality on "happiness" and how effective is this style of government? If you've ever studied any psychology or economics (or if you're particularly observant), you probably know that when people are given the option to work as much or as little as they want, with no tangible reason to work more/harder, they will tend to slack. Even more widely accepted is the principle that when people are given as much as they "need" with few or no checks, they will use more than if they could save money from those things. At college, I see people leave lights on, leave water running, use public printers for pages they read once and throw away, and generally waste. People eat more at a buffet than they would at a standard sit-down restaurant. My boyfriend's apartment has utilities included at one flat rate, and he takes more showers and uses more lights than he would if he had to pay for each usage directly out of pocket. There are certainly potential quotas for just how much of each resource an individual can use, but this increases the size of the government even more. "From each according to his ability, to each according to his need," right? But then, who determines the ability and need of each individual? Who mandates a certain level of productivity - one which is different from worker to worker? This must be done by a dictator, who will inevitably "need" a little more... I simply think that the dictator problem is inevitable, by the very nature of the requirements of government under a collectivist political system. I hate to fit a stereotype to quote Ayn Rand (go ahead and get the collective groan, no pun intended, out of the way), but "The man who speaks to you of sacrifice speaks of slaves and masters, and intends to be the master."It must be noted that there is a distinction between what someone is willing, able, and expected to share. In a free market system, we deal with the first. In a collectivist system, we deal with one or both of the latter. For example, right now I live in a house with seven other girls, most of whom I do not know very well. We share one refrigerator/freezer, and there is very limited room. I have posed the idea that, instead of having 4-5 gallons of milk in the fridge at the same time, we should go in together on milk, buying one gallon every couple of days. This would save space in the fridge and not cause any hardship, as inevitably someone is going to the store on almost any given day. Obviously, we would have to split the cost of the milk, and in fact, my fair share of the milk would cost more than the cost of the milk that I would actually consume. However, I would still be willing to do the communal action, if the others agree. Consenting to build communal roads is not the same as communism itself. It is still a matter of individual contributors with individual salaries contributing a (hopefully voluntary) portion of their income. A true collectivist political system requires complete surrender of income, discourages true productivity, encourages waste, and promotes totalitarianism.
Well-reasoned criticisms (of the arguments!) are welcome.
*Note that here I'm discussing communism and socialism as essentially the same in consequence. I do know there's a difference, but for these purposes, I don't find it meaningful or important.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
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What is your favorite summer memory?
I can't pick one. I loved GHP, TIP, SPECTACLES, Girl Scout Camp (Misty Moutain!), warm summer nights with George back in high school, hanging out in my dorm-house with Michelle or Gina, graduation, walking outside in shorts and a tank top, sunscreen, sandy water, short haircuts, light and carefree music, staying out with friends until 2AM - not drinking or anything stupid, just hanging out, frozen fruit and ice cream bars, swimming pools, cooking and hanging out with Steven, random sleepovers and midnight kroger runs with Courtney, long showers after a sweaty day, crisp grass under the shade of giant trees, sneaking into the school after it was seasonally out-of-order, and getting takeout to eat while sitting under the stars in the open trunk of my car.I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
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Summer statistics and a new haircut
I'm enrolled in one class in June, which is "Research Statistics" for my neuroscience major. The professor (Dr. Blatchley) is familiar to me from my Sensation & Perception class this past spring, which was great. The class is highly condensed, moving about three times the regular pace. However, it's still awful. We're essentially half-way through the class, and we only today got to information that I hadn't already been really familiar with, so I've been bored out of my mind.
Furthermore, Dr. B is NOT a math person. She simply doesn't understand the mathematical concepts behind the statistical formulas we're learning, and without a concept, I'll never understand the formula. For some people, it's enough to plug-and-chug, but I'm not okay with that approach to any academic subject. I'm here because I want to learn, but Dr. B cannot even explain things to me in a tone that makes sense to a mathematically-minded person.
If that wasn't enough, half the class consists of half-wits. Both my roommate Michelle and I got well over 100% on the first test, but apparently more than half the class (of only 10 students!) failed the first exam... which was over absolutely the most basic concepts I have studied in the past 5 years. Students ask how to do the order of operations. They've all completed at least one year of college - and graduated high school. WHAT THE HELL? They're wasting my class time with their idiotic antics, and they're still failing the class anyway. I am completely disgusted to be forced to waste my time on this in order to take higher level psychology classes. Fucking psychology majors. Psychology majors are the most stupid of any students in any concentration. I hate that, since we don't have a real neuroscience program, I'm stuck in classes with these idiots, and they're some of the largest classes on campus, since so many of the students are so stupid that they can't take anything but psychology.
Anyway, on a somewhat more positive note, I got a surprise haircut sunday night. My boyfriend wanted it a little shorter, so he was going to cut it off to donate. Unfortunately, he cut extremely asymmetrically and extremely short on the first snip. I got one of the other girls in the house to fix it, though, and now it's a cute chin-length bob, instead of the waist-length hair I had before. Michelle agreed to dye it red for me tomorrow. Pictures forthcoming!
Friday, May 16, 2008
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Do you believe that teenage mothers can still be successful at life? Why or why not?
Of course they can!
Generally, the problem with teenage mothers is that the same characteristics that caused them to get pregnant in the first place will continue to cause insurmountable road blocks (for instance, they probably won't choose long-term planning over short term rewards).
Also, having a child (and keeping it) can be very physically, emotionally, and academically stressful at that age. The social stigma attached, and the requirements for taking care of the child, will drain the mother, and she may not even want to succeed.
Regardless, she can still make the proactive decision to do something she loves with her life. She can hold a steady career once her child is old enough for preschool, she can find love and get married, she can go back to school once her child(ren) are a little older, and she can make a happy, healthy life for herself. Almost anyone has the capacity to do these things, regardless of what tragedy they have experienced. I just wish more people recognized the awesome power of their own determination and skill.
I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too!
Thursday, May 01, 2008
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Finals, etc.
Finals start tomorrow. I can be done as early as noon on Monday. I'm really not looking forward to them, but I don't think they'll be hard.
I'm mostly packed up, and it's very surreal to see all of my things in piles on the floor again. I'm not looking forward to being without a home for the next few years until I can afford one of my own.
I also need some money. It sucks to be in college and have no job. I've really been needing a new ink cartridge for my printer, tennis shoes, a phone, and some boxes (for my stuff).
It's hard to cope with this stress, particularly when I feel alone. I don't understand the prohibition against guests in the dorms around exam time. As long as I'm not being loud and distracting other people, don't I have the right to spend my own time as I see fit in my room?
I hope you're all doing well. I'm kind of burnt out right now, but tomorrow will be another day, I suppose.
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About Me
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"They dislike me, not because I do things badly, but because I do them well." -Ayn Rand Rose. Sophomore at ASC. 19. Intelligent. Poetic. Mathematician. Analytical. Logical. Compulsive. Abnormal. Perfectionist. Music. Piano. Vocal. Français. Food. Reading. Philosophy. Psychology. Vocabulary. I don't care what you think. Expressive. Loud. Just. Happy. Everything. Actress. Friend. Loyal. Political. Strong. Survivor. Libertarian. History. Objectivist. Love. Me. "Dagny, how did you do it? How did you manage to remain unmangled?" "By holding to just one rule." "Which?" "To place nothing - nothing- above the verdict of my own mind." "You've taken some terrible beatings... maybe worse than I did... worse than any of us... What held you through it?" "The knowledge that my life is the highest of values, too high to give up without a fight."
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